What has gotten in to me?

Summer is here, hooray! Time for shorts and sunbathing and bbq and margaritas on the porch. Also, time for the kids to be home ALL DAY LONG. Which, honestly, I mostly love. I enjoy hanging out with them, teaching them new things and talking about random and not-so-random things. They are a fun little group. But alas, I was spoiled during the school year and had my Husband to myself for a few hours every day, without my kiddos. So now that they are home practically 24/7, there is no real alone time for my Husband and I except after 10:30, by which time we are both pretty tired.

I can't believe I didn't realize just how easy I had it! We had plenty of time for sex, spanking, cuddle time, everything. But now we are doing our best to squeeze it in. I only get to have him 4 nights a week, as his second job takes him away the other three nights :(  So there are lots of quick half-spankings, groping in the hallways, sternly whispered lectures, and other overt signs that DD/D/s/ttwd is alive and well. And it is, really. I just suddenly find myself really wanting to challenge him!

It is so frustrating, because I know I shouldn't stick my tongue out at him, but I just get an overwhelming urge to do it, so sometimes I do. I know it's not in my best interest to refuse to answer the way he expects when he's HOLDING the paddle. But do I care? Apparently not. I am so frustrated with myself that I just don't know what to do. Why am I suddenly having such bratty impulses? Most of the time I am the mild-mannered good girl who serves her man respectfully. But sometimes, like daily, that girl goes away and the brat comes out.

Unfortunately, I think I know what will make The Brat go away(yes, I am giving that side of me a name now :) ) and that is an extra long, extra hard punishment that will leave me with no doubt as to who I am and how I am expected to behave. But.....I don't see how that is going to happen anytime soon. I would suggest alternative punishments to Ash, but he finds most of them "too childish for an adult"(his words).

Am I just being a big baby? Do I just need to suck it up and tell myself that if it sounds fun to do while Ash is around that I probably shouldn't do it? I don't know. Like I said, it only happens once or twice a day lately(although that is a lot, right?)that I have an irresistible urge to do something naughty. If anybody has any ideas, I'd love to hear them. If I am being a big spoiled weenie you should tell me that too. It's hard, sometimes to tell if you are just being self-indulgent or what.

I hope all of you out there is blogland are having a good week, and thanks for listening to me whine!

Laughing During Punishment

I kind of blew my own mind last night.  Ash and I had been having a very enjoyable evening together and went upstairs for bed around midnight.  I went into the bathroom to get ready and he got into bed.  When I came to get into bed, he was under his blankets and left mine in a pile! I hurried to get everything untangled and was flipping blankets all around when he asked me "What are you pissed off about?" I told him I wasn't, just trying to get my side of the bed situated and I was cold.  It took me a few minutes to finish with the blankets and another couple to get comfortable, all the while I was apparently "making pissy breathing noises and huffing my breath out like I was mad".  When I was finally settled, Ash grabbed my face in his hands and asked me again what was wrong. I, of course, said "Nothing!" because I wasn't mad, maybe annoyed that he left my side of the bed a mess.....but it was late and I wanted to move on to more fun activities :) Well, that is not what ended up happening.
Convinced I was upset(I was sure I wasn't), Ash continued to talk to me, and then started lecturing....but I interrupted him. Twice. In a row! I didn't really mean to, but I was trying to come to my own defense. Besides, now I was mad because he was making fun of my pouty face(which I most definitely was not

I have a confession to make.......

I have recently been working hard at effective communication with my husband about topics that fluster and embarrass me.  Today, it is taking the form of a "Let's pretend, and this is what I imagine" type letter to him.  I can imagine what his response will be :)


Dear Sir,

I have a confession to make:  I have been feeling a little mischievous and I’ve been very tempted to be disobedient these past few days! I don’t like feeling this way, but I don’t act on these feelings because I don’t want you to be disappointed in me. I don’t want to do anything too bad….I just want you to be angry or frustrated enough with me  that you really want to teach me a lesson not to mess with the boss.  Last night was very nice and I did enjoy my time with you, especially after you were done whipping me and let me “thank” you properly on my knees.  But….I am still feeling like being a bit wicked! So let’s pretend that I really did drop your phone in the bath…..which I took while you weren’t home!  When you asked me where your phone was and I told you what happened, would you make me take my pants off and stand in front of you in just my panties and t-shirt while you lectured me about following the rules?  Would you tell me I was a very naughty girl? Would you make me ask you nicely for my spanking before pulling me down over your lap on the bed? I would say “Please spank me hard, Sir” even though I didn’t want you to because I would know I deserved it. And even though I don’t want to be punished I would only beg a couple of times “Please don’t spank me, I’ll be good!”  But I’m sure you wouldn’t listen to me because you know that if you don’t thoroughly assert yourself when I misbehave that I will think you don’t care about me anymore.  And you really do love me, so you would make up your mind to show me just how much! I would squirm over your lap a little bit I’m sure, as I heard you open the paddle drawer to choose an implement.  I would be praying that it’s not the motivator!  Since you would be spanking me because I was bad, I just know you would spank hard right from the start! You would probably ignore my desperate pleas and tell me to hold still and take my spanking since I earned it.  Would you put your leg over mine to stop my kicking from ruining your aim? Would I try to wiggle away, only to discover that I can’t move and I am completely at your mercy?  I think I would feel helpless then and remember that you really are the boss, as you light a fire in my bottom cheeks!  Would you pull my panties down then to make sure I could feel every hard, fast smack?  I know you would keep going until my ass was bright red all over and I was crying hard, because that’s how to make sure naughty wives remember to behave.  You would probably stop then and ask me if I was going to be good.  Of course I would answer “Yes, Sir” because I don’t want to be spanked anymore!  But you wouldn’t really care about what I want right then, just about what I need.  And I bet you’d think I need a little more “convincing” to really be good and not end up in trouble again anytime soon.  So you would decide to keep going, slower but very hard, while you remind me why I’m in trouble.  I bet you’d say “Do NOT take a bath unless I am home!” and “You should have been paying attention to the phone so it wouldn’t drop!” in between smacks. Then, once you were convinced that I was one very sorry girl, you would let me up and hold me.  You would tell me that it’s ok now and that I am your good girl again.  And I would know that you speak the truth: the punishment you selflessly administered has magically transformed me into an angel, and I know I wouldn’t feel the urge to be a brat for quite a while! 

A Public Spanking......Almost?

Today I had to go to my least favorite shopping venue in the whole world: Walmart.  Ash (my husband) had to come with me so he could pick up some manly stuff I wouldn't have found even though he hates shopping.  I really cannot tell you how much I hate this place.  People are rude and it smells like old fried food in there, plus I don't like crowds to begin with.  So Ash was pushing the cart as I walked slightly behind him (he's fast!) and texting someone so he kept stopping and I thought it was obnoxious. Of course I'm such an angel that I didn't tell him that, I just offered to to push the cart in, um, maybe not my sweetest tone.  He declined and we continued.  I continued to gripe throughout our trip and apparently he had had enough by the time we were done checking out because he asked me quite loudly as we were walking away from the checkstand "Do you need a spanking right now? Should I turn you over my knee right here? We could get them to do the announcement, you know: Ding ding, beat your wife!" Of course I insisted that I did not need any such intervention, trying my hardest not to blush to my roots and failing.  I was too embarrassed to look around to see if people were staring, so I just ducked my head and kept walking with him.  I didn't think he would truly do such a thing, as we have discussed it before and he said he wouldn't out in the open.  But sometimes he throws me for a loop.  He says he likes to keep me on my toes.  I didn't get spanked when we got home either as I was exhausted from throwing mini tantrums shopping and our children were due to arrive shortly.  Not that I am complaining! My booty hasn't had a very good "workout" in almost a month due to kids on vacation, and I am apprehensive about the first real spanking I will get since they're back at school. I have been given shorter ones or a quick hard paddling with the big scary paddle, but not much else.  Personally I don't think I should be blamed for my behavior today.  I did try some of the time to be good :)  I guess we'll see what Ash has to say when he comes home tonight.  Wish me luck!

Shower, Interrupted

Author's note: this is an unedited copy. 

I had just finished soaping myself all over with the fragrant shower gel on my loofah, scrubbing gently in all my nooks and crannies and luxuriating in the heady floral smell and the slippery feel of the soap bubbles popping all over my body.  Now came the best part.  I turned the water up a little warmer and adjusted the spray so it was soft, like a heavy rain shower and leaned against the shower wall as wave after wave of warm water cascaded down over me.  This was the ultimate in relaxation, to hell with conserving water and energy! After what seemed like much too short a time, I could feel the water begin to cool again.  Damn, the hot water was running out. As I reached down to adjust the temperature, a hand suddenly clasped over mine.
 I gasped in shock, and felt adrenaline course through me as the fight or flight instinct suddenly took over and I prepared to kick some intruder ass. I looked up at my would-be attacker only to find my husband grinning at me.  "Logan! You scared me you ass!" I said as I glared accusingly at him.  "Jumpy this morning are we?" He retorted, his smile deepening.  "Well I am now, but I don't see why it makes you so happy," I said, trying not to be won over by his infectious grin.  "Well, sweetheart, the reason for my joy is that I get to interrupt your shower routine this morning, as you interrupted mine yesterday morning."  Apparently I had missed something because I had no clue what he was talking about, and I told him so. His look turned more serious.  "Jennifer, do you mean to tell me you have completely forgotten that you used all the hot water yesterday morning immediately after I reminded you not to?"  "Oh, that.  Um, yeah I guess I did.  I am sorry about that, but it doesn't give you the right to scare me half to death!" Once again that shit-eating grin adorned Logan's face as though he had a secret and it just thrilled him.

 "Why are you looking at me like that?" I questioned, since he obviously had something up his sleeve.  "Because I know why you used all the hot water yesterday," he gloated.  Immediately blood rushed to my cheeks as my embarrassment colored my face.  "You forgot to change the spray setting back to normal on the shower head before you got out.  And we both know that there is only one reason that you use the strong pulsing setting on the nozzle." I wanted to shrivel up and die on the spot.  He knew I had been masturbating with the shower head! I had been practicing every now and then because I wanted to be able to orgasm on my own, something I hadn't been able to do for a long time.  I had to have him inside me to be able to come and he knew it, the smug bastard. I had always thought that he was pleased by this, and my suspicions were confirmed when he began to talk again.